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From a date to a relationship

I want a serious relationship, but do other people?

I want a serious relationship, but do other people?

Dear Paula,

I came out nearly a year ago (I am 29) and the process of coming to terms with my sexuality was very hard for me. I come from a very religious background and it was very hard for me to overcome the feelings of shame that I felt. I’ve had quite a lot of counselling, which was helpful although I still haven’t quite overcome all those feelings. The problem I have with dating now is that I’m very shy and cautious and a lot of things about the gay scene scare me. I would like to have a serious, long term relationship but I’m quite scared that nobody else wants the same things that I do. Abdullah

Dear Abdullah

I think you should be very proud of yourself for what you have achieved so far in being honest about your sexuality to yourself and to others. There are plenty of other men out there who want to have serious long-term relationships although I know it doesn’t always feel like that. Internet dating is a good way to start, and Parship does specifically cater for people who are interested in serious, long-term relationships so you should be able to meet like minded people. However, it’s probably best to take things slowly –you’ve come a long way and you should give yourself a chance to become settled and comfortable with your sexuality before embarking on a serious relationship. So start off meeting some people and making new friends and see how things go. Best Wishes, Paula.

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